Did you know that people who try to spice up their lovemaking, often make their experiences LESS fulfilling? It¡¦s true.
Over the years, I've seen couples make the same mistakes over and over again, when trying to improve their love lives, and I'd like to teach you how to overcome and avoid these problems. Here are the 7 lovemaking mistakes. Are you making them?
Mistake #1: Feeling scared or embarrassed to talk about trying new things
Have you ever had an idea to spice up your lovemaking but were afraid of what your partner may think? Believe it or not, in 90% of cases, your partner would LOVE to try something new, too, but they're just as uncomfortable or embarrassed about bringing it up as you are.
And you don't need to introduce whips, chains or a third person. That's nonsense! There are hundreds of ways to bring variety to your passionate play that aren't crude or dangerous and that your partner is sure to be comfortable with.
Mistake #2: Trying to convince the partner to make love
If your lover is tired or not in the mood for sex, trying to convince or persuade them to have sex almost NEVER works. On the other hand, when a person is sexually aroused, their body releases the chemical 'adrenaline' into the bloodstream. This chemical is what gives you the energy to make love. So here's how to arouse them the right way. Yes, even if they're tired.
Ladies: Want to get him in the mood? Give him fellatio or manually stroke him between 9 ¡V 10 in the morning. This is when his testosterone levels are highest for the day. For better results, also wear something sexy or nothing at all. He'll like that.
Lads: Deep passionate kisses are one of the biggest 'turn-ons' for women. Looking in her eyes and touching her face while kissing her can really increase arousal, too. And give some attention to her neck¡V¡Vit will drive her wild. But don't rush this! Spend quality time building up her arousal with your sensual kisses.
Mistake #3: Neglecting foreplay to enjoy intercourse sooner
People in a relationship (especially men) tend to neglect foreplay so they can begin to enjoy intercourse sooner, but did you know that foreplay is actually said to intensify orgasms?
That's right. If you kiss, caress and touch longer, you can make your lovemaking even more satisfying. So SLOW DOWN. Take your time. If you want to make it even better, tease your partner in a playful way. (This works like crazy.)
If you find something that they really enjoy, stop doing it, move back, and then do it again later. The more you pull back and push forward, the more they'll want it. And the more intense their experience will be. There are many games you can play to heighten this anticipation, too.
Mistake #4: Using toys or porn to make your lovemaking better
When sex hits a rough patch, many couples (men especially) think that a video, some plastic or vibrating thingy will instantly takes things through the roof.
Wrong!¡K While toys can certainly have their place in your lovemaking repertoire, relying on them can be extremely dangerous. These outside sources of pleasure can quickly make lovemaking even less fulfilling.
Why? Because you don't want your partner to end up looking forward to their plastic toy for pleasure more than they look forward to pleasure with you, do you? Couples need to first fully discover how to please all their spouses' body parts before introducing other elements. Use them as a spice, not the main course.
Mistake #5: Trying to make the woman orgasm ONLY from intercourse
Men often feel "unmanly"
if they can't satisfy their woman from intercourse. But what they need to understand
is that a large number of women can't achieve orgasm through normal lovemaking.
Just knowing this takes the pressure off men completely. Now there's no need
to get upset when their women don¡¦t reach orgasm. Instead, men should
master the art of cunnilingus (going down on a woman).
Mistake #6: Trying to ¡§finish¡¨ at the same time
Simultaneous orgasms are quite overrated. Instead of aiming for one orgasm that you share together, focus completely on the woman¡¦s needs first. Hold off from the positions you find most enjoyable and instead make love in ways that are most pleasurable for your lady, until she is completely satisfied. That way you have a much greater chance of both climaxing.
Mistake #7: Sticking to a ¡§set routine¡¨ too often
You know the drill. You take your clothes off, insert part A into part B, and, within a few minutes, the routine is over. Sound familiar?
No matter how fantastic lovemaking can be, there¡¦s no denying it can get boring over the years. And the reason is because lovemaking in its basic act is always the same. But the danger is letting it get ¡§too routine,¡¨ which can begin to affect your relationship.
The BEST WAY to protect your love life and precious connection with your partner is to have lots of new lovemaking ideas ready at your disposal.
That's the secret.
In fact, when you have an abundance of NEW tips and techniques ready, you¡¦ll enjoy more hot, steamy and passionate lovemaking, discover newfound enthusiasm to make love and even make love more often.
About the Author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the author of 500 Lovemaking Tips, a book full of ways to spice up your lovemaking, adding more passion, pleasure and intimacy to your experience. To read more, visit: 500 Lovemaking Tips and Secrets
| More Tags: On our way homeward his heart seemed overflowing with generous and happy feelings. As we passed over a rising ground which commanded something of a prospect, the sounds of rustic merriment now and then reached our ears; the Squire paused for a few moments, and looked around with an air of inexpressible benignity. The beauty of the day was of itself sufficient to inspire philanthropy. Notwithstanding the frostiness of the morning, the sun in his cloudless journey had acquired sufficient power to melt away the thin covering of snow from every southern declivity, and to bring out the living green which adorns an English landscape even in midwinter. Large tracts of smiling verdure contrasted with the dazzling whiteness of the shaded slopes and hollows. Every sheltered bank on which the broad rays rested yielded its silver rill of cold and limpid water, glittering through the dripping grass; and sent up slight exhalations to contribute to the thin haze that hung just above the surface of the earth. There was something truly cheering in this triumph of warmth and verdure over the frosty thraldom of winter; it was, as the Squire observed, an emblem of Christmas hospitality, breaking through the chills of ceremony and selfishness, and thawing every heart into a flow. He pointed with pleasure to the indications of good cheer reeking from the chimneys of the comfortable farmhouses and low, thatched cottages. "I love," said he, "to see this day well kept by rich and poor; it is a great thing to have one day in the year, at least, when you are sure of being welcome wherever you go, and of having, as it were, the world all thrown open to you; and I am almost disposed to join with Poor Robin, in his malediction of every churlish enemy to this honest festival: "'Those who at Christmas do repine, And would fain hence despatch him, May they with old Duke Humphry dine, Or else may Squire Ketch catch 'em.'" The Squire went on to lament the deplorable decay of the games and amusements which were once prevalent at this season among the lower orders, and countenanced by the higher: when the old halls of castles and manor-houses were thrown open at daylight; when the tables were covered with brawn, and beef, and humming ale; when the harp and the carol resounded all day long, and when rich and poor were alike welcome to enter and make merry. "Our old games and local customs," said he, "had a great effect in making the peasant fond of his home, and the promotion of them, by the gentry made him fond of his lord. They made the times merrier, and kinder, and better; and I can truly say, with one of our old poets: "'I like them well-the curious preciseness And all-pretended gravity of those That seek to banish hence these harmless sports, Have thrust away much ancient honesty.' [4] See Note D. "The nation," continued he, "is altered; we have almost lost our simple, true-hearted peasantry. They have broken asunder from the higher classes, and seem to think their interests are separate. They have become too knowing, and begin to read newspapers, listen to alehouse politicians, and talk of reform. I think one mode to keep them in good humour in these hard times would be for the nobility and gentry to pass more time on their estates, mingle more among the country people, and set the merry old English games going again." |